A couple weeks ago I briefly touched on a past relationship that didn’t turn out so well. And that reminded me that around that time (we’re getting on 20 years here) my friend Andrea was in a relationship that also was not good for her.

Andrea met Roy online our sophomore year of college. They chatted through IMs, MySpace, and on the phone for almost a year before finally meeting in person. We were at school in the Hill Country of Texas, and Roy lived down in Corpus Christi, about a three hour drive south.

But one weekend, after our group of friends had finally saved enough money and worked out all the details, we all drove down and grabbed a hotel so that Andrea could finally meet Roy face to face. The two of them spent the whole weekend doing all the things that a couple who has been “dating” for a year online would do when finally together. We barely saw them.

When we got back to school, they continued to chat or message each other all day, every day for a couple weeks, but then one day he stopped responding. After all this time, Roy didn’t even have to guts or respect to break up with her. He just ghosted her.

Andrea was absolutely heartbroken. It took weeks for her to understand what had happened, and months to even begin to get over it.

Then one night while we’re lying in our beds about to go to sleep, she sat up and said to me, “You know what? I think I’m finally over Roy.”

You might not believe this, but I swear it’s true. In the middle of the night, that very same night, Roy finally called her. How did he know???? That bastard.

Andrea took her phone with her into the bathroom and didn’t come out for two hours. I don’t recall exactly what happened over the next few months, but I think it involved Andrea trying to forgive Roy while still holding back, Roy promising he would change and never do it again, and then, of course, doing it again. He ghosted her for the second time about three months later, but this time Andrea was ready for it. There weren’t as many tears, and she was able to move on much faster.

And then about a year later that prick fucking died.

He was car surfing and the car hit a curb or had to stop suddenly or something. Roy flew off, landed on the pavement, and died. Just like that. Neither Andrea nor I, nor any of our friends ever really wonder or think about Roy anymore, but you can’t help wondering where he would’ve ended up if he’d made better choices all around. Also, he deprived Andrea of the hope of ever getting an apology or explanation of why he couldn’t just send a text – Hey Babe, it’s over. Is that so hard???

Anyways, she’s been with a man for the past 18 years or so who treats her right and makes her happy. So everything turned out alright in the end. Except for Roy, of course, but that’s on him.